May 2010
3 posts
1 tag
formspring.me
Ask me anything http://formspring.me/Quintumply
“You get the fire lighters and I’ll get the Super Mario costume.”
– Craig Charles’s’s’ss’ Dad (possibly)
4 tags
Politics?
My my, it’s been a long time since I was last here. Longer than a 30cm ruler, that’s for sure. Possibly longer than a yardstick as well, but I’m not really up for proving that right now.
So anyway, all I’ve been hearing about recently is something to do with “politics”. I assume it’s a misspelling of the term, “polytick”, which is a...
March 2010
2 posts
2 tags
Ethereal Killer
I was going to type out a nice, long day in the life of my given alter-ego, BFK, but then I started considering the potential consequences of claiming to be a vicious murderer on the internet.
So I decided against it.
Instead, an article from an imaginary newspaper:
“BABY FACED KILLER
At 4am yesterday in McDrummelsby estate, a baby five months of age witnessed the breaking and entering...
1 tag
formspring.me
Ask me anything http://formspring.me/Quintumply
February 2010
3 posts
1 tag
Re: Re: Science!
Going back to my Facebook experiment, I’ve decided to postpone it until I can be bothered to conduct further research.
3 tags
Bridge Ache
There’s a page on Facebook entitled, “Don’t fall in love, fall off a bridge. It hurts less”. How do you know this? Unless an adventurous and infatuated man falls off a bridge and confirms this, there’s not going to be any evidence as to which is more painful.
Also, is it really possible to accurately compare physical pain with emotional pain? Discuss.
1 tag
Neglected blog is neglected.
January 2010
13 posts
1 tag
Re: Science!
Interesting.
My status update, “Dancing.” had no likes at all. Perhaps I have confused the masses with my nonsensical update. A more socially recognisable status is obviously needed.
I shall tell of my annoyance at a customer at work today. This shall surely pick up a couple of likes.
3 tags
Science!
Time for an experiment, boys and girls.
Facebook. The social hub of the internet, where everyone, their pet dog and their pet dog’s poo has an account. Status updates are probably the most frequently used aspect of the site, followed closely by becoming fans of utterly pointless things, such as ‘Whenever I’m telling a story I always say “and I was like.”’
...
3 tags
2 tags
Pip-pip
Good day to you all.
I am pleased to tell you that, as I type this, I am wearing a rather spiffing top hat, gifted upon me by a dear friend. Jolly good it is, too. It is ever so slightly too large, and I have no occasion or venue to wear it to, but clearing out my room uncovered the joy of simply wearing a top hat as you go about your daily business.
I also feel it is my duty to inform you...
2 tags
2 tags
Anger Management
Hey, you there. Yes, with the sunhat on.
WHY ARE YOU WEARING A SUNHAT.
It’s freezing, wear a woolen hat that makes you look stupid, not an ironic hat of injustice. You mumper.
Deary me, what are we going to do with you? I dare say we hang you by the ankles and throw pancakes at you, but the police wouldn’t like that. Hmm. This is a problem. What if you simply fell over on your...
3 tags
3 tags
A New Persona
Mr. Work Colleague: Yo yo, BK!
Quintumply: ...What?
Mr. Work Colleague: BK, you know.. The Baby-faced Killer!
Quintumply: Ok...
Mr. Work Colleague: You're proper gangster, don't take no shit from nobody.
Quintumply: *bewilderment*
Mr. Work Colleague: He's a madman. Wouldn't wanna meat him in a dark alley. Hey, how many times you been in prison, BK?
Quintumply: ...9?
Mr. Work Colleague: Shit.. Who'd you meet in there?
Quintumply: Michael Jackson.
Mr. Work Colleague: What was he in jail for man?
Quintumply: I dunno, paedophilia?
Mr. Work Colleague: Ah yeah, 'course.
Stockroom: *long pause*
Quintumply: *leaves*
2 tags
And Now, the Weather
Good morning!
The heat wave we’ve had over the last few days will unfortunately be staying with us until at least the weekend, with the Northern territory and the east of Queensland in particular affected by the warm weather. Not helping is the wind, or lack of it. Light breezes will be blowing over the west coast from this morning, picking up slightly towards the afternoon, but still not...
4 tags
“Fuck me, it’s cold.”
– Everyone
1 tag
Spreading the Word
Quintumply: So yeah, I made a new blog today.
Officer Prickle: Oh aye? Whussat about then?
Quintumply: I dunno, really. I'm just gonna post a bunch of stuff and see what happens. There's not a huge deal of thought going into this, really.
Officer Prickle: M'wife's blog is all about desks.
Quintumply: Is there much demand for that?
Officer Prickle: Certainly, m'boy. For a start, IKEA learned all about furniture from th'wife. She's the expert in desks, office chairs and coasters. Tha's right.
Quintumply: Coasters? That's not furniture.
Officer Prickle: ARE YOU QUESTIONIN' M'WIFE'S LIFE WORK, BOY? I CAN HAVE YOU LOCKED UP BY MORNIN, SUNSHINE.
Quintumply: Why am I talking to you?
3 tags
Deary me, what have I started.
Well, yes, a...
3 tags
